I dont even know the old bastard, hell i dont even have a picture of him facing a camera i have 2 pictures and hes not looking in either of them. i havent seen this "guy" since i was 4 years old, and the worst part is we've lived in the same city my whole life. i dont know if he just never cared to look for me or what. but in my dream he sure in the hell knew who i was.
i woke up thinking he must either be thinking about me, be looking for me (i doubt it), or knows im looking for him. i cant find much about him online but i do know he owned his own cement company, he was in a union, hes got a house boat, at least 3 properties in Hayward, hes probably around 67, his name is George William Burchell, and he owes me back pay on child support.
i know he has other kids, i dont even know how many. he could even be dead for all i know.
i jsut want to find him and knock on his door and see if he knows who i am when he opens it. from what im told i look alot like my mom.
RIP Mommy(maybe not so much from that picture, maybe if i do my hair like that. )
maybe ive got daddy issues, or maybe i want to spit in his face, or maybe ill give him a chance, or we can just talk to something, i dont know anymore. ive been wanting to meet him for so long i just feel like my time is running out for some reason. hes the only blood parent i got left. i just wanna know what he would say to me. would he try to apologize or just shrug it off. ive got so many questions and all i ever think is that he'll shoot them all down and go back to ignoring my existence. hes done a pretty damn good job so far.
but i guess everyone deserves a chance :/ guess my mind is going to be running around in circles all day, chasing its tail, till it blows up. BOOM......
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